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My Favorite Thing

For the finale of this First Annual #RABlog Week I’d love to share with you my 
Wildcard 2: Tell us what you really enjoy and how that helps with RA.
Well, that should be simple. Blogging, duh! 😉


I really can’t tell you how important blogging is to me. I love everything about it. 

So when I started this blog in 2011 on tumblr, I was very nervous. 
I really wanted my blog to be authentic. An honest reflection of my thoughts, whether they were likable or not. I wanted to never hold back and show what Rheumatoid Arthritis really looks like. Not like the bogus commercials on TV. 
But opening myself up was nerve-wracking! Especially to criticism, knowing that the whole entire world was reading my innermost thoughts!

So, cautiously, I wrote my first post.
       And then I figured out I only had like 10 readers, so I decided to let it flow! Ha Ha! 

For me, blogging isn’t about the amount readers or followers I have. As much as I love my readers and truly cherish the connections I’ve made through blogging.
I mostly do it for ME!
I was recently engaged when I started this blog and all I wanted to share my journey.
The magnificent ups and the treacherous downs in life with RA.

And not just my physical journey, but my emotional journey.
I don’t hide behind the curtain and share the pretty side to RA.
I share the bad times too of when I’m angrydisappointed, or in pain

But my absolute favorite part is sharing my victories. 
The good times, when I feel great! When I’m traveling, or gardening
But most importantly, when I accepted having Rheumatoid Arthritis. 
The truth is I believe having a Chronic Illness like Arthritis 
doesn’t just affect our bodies, it affects our souls as well. 
And I’d like others like me to know that it does get better. 🙂


#RAgingFatigue

The people who know me best know that I’m like a raging bull. 
Once I make a decision about something, there’s no going back. 
—-This is what my mom says. Hi, mom! 
So, when my Rheumatoid Arthritis came back with a vengeance at age 17, you can only imagine how that stubborn personality translated into a quest for a normal life despite RA. 😉

But this time, it wasn’t the same RA as my childhood. It was worse. Much worse.
This “newer-stronger” RA wasn’t something I could mentally overpower or even something that was responding treatment
No matter how hard I pushed myself, no matter how hard I tried, I just could not keep up with my classmates. I was studying Architecture and it was just impossible to wrap my fiercly swollen fingers around a pencil, let alone draw a floor plan for 7 hours.

And that wasn’t all. 

I had fatigue. Besides the swelling that makes closing my fist impossible, and the stiffness that won’t allow me to sit for more than an hour, and the excruciating pain, I. WAS. EXHAUSTED. 
It’s like having the flu, but worse. I once explained it to someone like this:

“It feels like gravity changed overnight and I feel so heavy and weak I can’t get up.”

And you wanna know what the crazy part is? Even after 19 years of having RA and 7 years of my “RA vengeance” (the more severe version of my RA), I still feel it. 
I still feel the fatigue. I still struggle to get out of bed, to put on make-up, to go to school (different major ;), to travel, etc. I still struggle to do everything.

BUT my stubborn personality won’t let me give up, and I just take 1-3 shots of espresso to get me through the day, and rest up a ton the next day. 
Because that makes me happy. 

Please excuse my yawns. 😉

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